Inspiration In Practice

I am always taken aback when someone tells me how inspiring my life is to them. It certainly makes my heart happy that I am helping others consider options that they may not have thought possible originally and I am so grateful for the reminder of the ripples my life generates.

I love to set big goals that most would shy away from because I have learned that there is as much ability to reach an amazing goal as an average one! I have also learned by stretching myself over the years that I am far more capable than I allow myself to believe most days.

I want to let you all in on the whole story though – I have the same fears, insecurities and self-doubts as everyone and I don’t always get it right.

Leaper

images

Look, you all have been in my world long enough to know I’m a leaper. I have had tremendous success and a few epic failures. I know there is more than one side to this coin I’ve chosen for my journey.

What fuels my courage?

The possibilities of each leap I take are my main inspiration.  I do a lot of research on the bigger leaps I take, but there is always an unknown. I plan for what I can and anticipate as much as possible, however I have learned that I cannot control the outcome.

I have  learned that control an illusion, and my grandest idea of the best outcome is limited by my experiences. There might be a far greater outcome possible if I get out of my own way and let it unfold!

Epic Failures

I have also had the benefit of failures of epic proportions both business and personal. The benefit to these experiences is that at my lowest point, I was never out. I got pretty low and close to the absolute bottom and I learned that if you jump in a body of water and hit the bottom, you can propel yourself to the top at a speed that shatters a slow swim from the middle!

Freediving-Freedive-Adventure-Photography-05

Plan B

My sister and I have a history of making plans that somehow might just not turn out exactly as we originally planned. My Type A sister has come a long way and now without any hesitation will say, “Oh well! What’s plan B?”

We call ourselves the Plan B Girls now because it never riles us and because we have a goal in mind and we are determined to figure out a way to get to what is important. We have have learned not to waste time with what could have been and go around what is inconvenient or unplanned to reach our end goal.  It’s brilliant!

When Contingency Planning Gets In The Way

I am a risk manager by trade (20+ years in the legal field will do this to you) however, there are times when you can sabotage your goal by planning on “what if’s”.

Sure I recognize that things won’t always go the way I am hoping and planning. When setting goals with others and myself, examining the full picture is critical to be prepared for what might come up.

Be careful though not to scare yourself right out of your dream!

Right before I left California I almost did this to myself. I was halfway done selling all my items and planning my move to another country and I woke up one morning in a complete panic!

What if my clients don’t follow me online?

What if I get to Panama and I don’t have any way to make money?

What will I do if I can’t run my business in Panama?

I worked myself up so much that I actually considered scrapping the entire move and going back to the workforce and getting another paralegal job (gasp!)

My Truth

It was in the moment that I was considering scrapping my business and getting a “real job” that the nausea set in. It was immediate and visceral and unable to be ignored.

The one thing I have learned is that my body speaks to me! In those moments of self-doubt and insecurity when I retreat to the familiar, my body says, “I don’t think so! You don’t belong there anymore, you’ve learned what you were supposed to – time to move on!”

Wow, I’m so glad for this!

Conviction

In the case of my Panama move, well, you all know how that turned out and I am happy to say, I’m having one of the most successful years in my business to date.

I had to do a couple of things to get here though:

  1. Decide that this was the path I wanted and it was indeed possible to succeed.
  2. Determine what markers I would use to signal a need to reassess my move.

Once those two items were in place, I was ready to move on with confidence that I would not hit total bottom and become homeless in Panama before reassessing my options. I further committed to making it work because I believed in my business and I’d seen my clients follow me when I moved from Boston, so I had proof it could happen.

Your Turn

So now I ask you, are you talking yourself out of what you really want to accomplish? Is there a possibility you are selling yourself short?  I am certain you are far more capable than you give yourself credit for!

I encourage you to set your real goals this year, you know the ones I’m talking about, the ones that maybe you’re even a little afraid to tell others about because maybe they’ll laugh or try to talk you out of them.

As I head forward into a new year in a new location, I am filled with gratitude for this audience with whom share my journey. It is you who continue to inspire me to see how high I might reach and if I in turn inspire you a bit to reach as well – then I am doubly grateful!

Let’s do this!

images

Advertisements

Cultivating Courage

There are so many things that keep people from living a life they dream about. There is one thing is more powerful than even the dream itself though.

You probably have experienced this in your life, it’s the thing that prevents you from asking the pretty girl out or talking to that handsome guy. It’s the thing that prevents you for asking for the raise or promotion or starting your own dream business. It stands between you and what you really want.

It is FEAR

When I hear of this it breaks my heart because, although I’ve been stopped by fear too, I have learned to cultivate courage and because of this, a whole new world has opened up for me.

I would love to encourage you to explore and enhance your courage.

Courage isn’t the absence of fear, it is the making of action in spite of fear.

– M. Scott Peck

So how do we cultivate courage in the face of fear? There are several methods – what I do is; Name it and face it head on (not for the faint of heart!)

A prime example for you. I had a fear of drowning, so I did what every normal person does and signed up for scuba diving class. My thought was the best way to conquer this was to put a load of heavy stuff on my back and get dropped into the ocean where the bottom was forty feet down.

I know, for most people that is crazy! And for me, it was even a bit crazy, however all my fears disappeared when after having what felt like twenty pounds of equipment on my back where I could barely stand up, imagine my surprise when I couldn’t get below surface! My instructor had to come over and put more weight in my vest!

It turned out, and has almost proved true every time since, that usually my fear is completely made up out of my imagination. I have learned that I have an incredible imagination and one that works even better when I have few facts involved.  If I gather  more facts about that which I fear, I can sometimes ease my fear.

How about you?

If you begin to really think about something you are scared to do in your life. Regardless if this “thing” is small or large and really research it or look into it in detail, you might find out that you are making fake news about this “thing.” By looking into the real details you might find it no longer quite so scary. In some cases combatting your imagination with enough truth will allow the fear to subside enough to make a step.

Another technique I use is the best case/worst case scenario. I often find myself developing this worst case scenario which is (again with the incredible imagination) a spectacular fail. You know the kind, where you don’t only fail, but you have an epic fail where your whole life crumbles in one fell swoop.

I have come to realize – through many failings – that I rarely, if ever, have I failed this spectacularly. If I did, it would make a great story and one you would certainly one day find here, but alas, it has yet to happen.

The converse of this worst-case scenario is what would happen if you spectacularly succeed? We often get so caught up in preventing an epic fail, we hardly look at the benefits of taking such a risk. The benefits are usually great (which is why we want to do the “thing”) however we spend little time with our imagination focused on what life will be like if we succeed – even a little.

The final question to ask yourself is, what will your life be like if you never try? When I took my scuba course, I got a certified teacher and went though all the classes and guess what? I didn’t drown and I’m a certified diver and have been all over the world diving and I absolutely love it! My life is forever changed by the opportunity to explore a part of this planet that not everyone gets to see.

“You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”

– Benjamin Mee

So I encourage you to work through one of these exercises in your journal, muster up your twenty seconds of courage and try something you’ve been afraid to try. The amount your life expands when you overcome a fear is fantastic and it leads you to the knowledge that you are truly only limited by your own thoughts.

Blue Hole-17-01-06 021